Oh The Douchebaggery

Mama has a new job.

I know I should be hallelujah'ing, but it's not like I am movin' on up.

I had to go to TJ Maxx today to find an undershirt that would magically transform my new work shirt into something less than a one-woman burlesque show.
Whoever decided that a form-fitting, transparent, poly/lycra blend was appropriate for daytime wear is clearly a sadist...
or, well...a straight man.

I'm not exactly complaining.

I mean, it's Christmas. I keep seeing softly lit commercials with the faintest twinkling of bells and voice overs of people talking about their loved ones followed by the ubiquitous ad-spot for jewelry, toys, McNuggets...ya'know, all proofs of love, Capitalist style.

I would love to go shopping.

Wait. Let me reiterate.

I am the rare woman that detests Sex and the City (go on haters, bring it!), loathes fruity drinks (folks, that splash of cran is just there to fool you into thinking I am a lady), and HATES shopping.

I would just love to be able to have that disposable income.
And let's face it...If you are buying somebody an ear-muffler/sock set, chances are you have money to throw away.

Yeah, we are in a recession.
I am feeling it.
You are probably feeling it.

If you had the foresight to make your chosen field that of a doctor, a pharmaceutical sales rep., or a real-estate agent dealing in foreclosures, than YOU are only feeling the aftertaste of champagne wishes and caviar dreams.

Good for you.
And Merry Christmas to yours!

As it stands, I have this romantic vision of Christmas...sugar-plum fairies and all.

We might not have had a lot of money growing up but my parents were damn good at fostering dreams.

So. Here I am...When my mother was my age she already had three children and more than a few Christmas' under her belt.
As much as I am bothered by the actuality of the season, I am heartened by the intent my parents' gave it.

It's all about surrounding yourself with the people you love.

I mean, if I was on the dole and had one stick of government cheese left, sure as shootin', I'd pick up some complimentary toothpicks from the Whole Foods and make a ghetto deli platter to celebrate the occasion.

Looks like I am about to be able to afford my own cheese.*

*(But it really is about surrounding yourself with the people you love. And the cheese you love. Stay away from my cheese, good for nothing scoundrels!)

I'm Yosemite Sam!

Merry Christmas!