Oh The Douchebaggery

I am once again pissed off at my computer.

Many of you know my problems with mac have been frustratingly frequent.

A few days ago my firefox went haywire so I have been using the wildly inferior Safari browser.
And every time I want to look something up that I know I have looked up like, a million times before, I have to type the whole damn thing in.

Now, I am by no means fluent in computer terminology, but isn't that called enabling cookies?
I cannot for the life of me figure out how to do it.

And I cannot bring myself to go to the apple store yet again, because I'm sure they have started to think me some feeble-minded putz.

I have too much pride to drag my ass into that shame spiral.

And, oh lordy, please do NOT get me started on Itunes.
I can't afford a fancy Ipod. No, I have a faux-pod.
And because apple has such a monopoly on music sharing, I am unable to get my music onto my crappy Mp3 player.
So, when I want to rock out at the gym I am forced to listen to f.m. radio.

Heavens to murgatroid! Contemporary pop sucks a fat one.

There's this new media darling, Katy Perry, who just gets my goat.
She kissed a girl. Big deal. What self-respecting woman hasn't experimented a little.


Wow, you are soooo counter-culture.

So today I heard her new hit.
I'm not sure what it's called, but suffice it to say, it blows meteor-sized chunks.

The refrain has this clever bon mot..."You change your mind like a girl changes clothes".

Ummmmm, since when did girls corner the market on changing clothes?
What kind of stinky-ass dudes are you hanging with?

Some stupid magazine I was reading dubbed this bitch "America's next pop goddess".

Well, if that's true, consider me a heretic.