Oh The Douchebaggery

It's certainly not bringing any boys to the yard.

I went out with a friend last night who, as of late, is making all the men swoon.
Of course, she has a boyfriend, so all the attention is moot.

Meanwhile, I am desperately single and ready to get my lovin' on.

What the hell.

Everytime I have a man in my life I am constantly hit on.

It's like some serpent eating it's own tail affair.
One can't win.

So if I need a man in order to get a man, I might as well just settle, yeah?
Attention all balding, overweight, middle-aged, acne pocked men with self-esteem issues:
I'm available!